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PleasureBonBon Forum -> PleasureBonBon.com Personal Stuff ~ A sad day... |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 7:55 am
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 504
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My father passed away sometime during the night in his sleep, he was 57. I was about to leave for work when I went into his bedroom to say goodbye, and discovered that he was cold and still. I immediately called 911 but he had been gone for several hours. I'm currently still dealing with the fact that one of my few human contacts in the real world is gone, and as such I may be out of contact for awhile. I don't know if this means if I will cancel my subscription or not, it depends on what kind of financial resources I have when this is all taken care of. Thank you for your kindness and support in my creative endeavors.
-Gantros "CJ (my real name reserved for my friends)" Obscura |
_________________ Most have only two choices in life, a life of happiness, or a life of meaning. It is truly a rare thing when one can achieve both. But given the choice, I choose happiness. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 8:22 am
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 27 Jul 2007
Posts: 167
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I'm so sorry to hear that Gantros, I wish there was something I could do to help, but I know there isn't. I hope you can get through this with your friends and family. My thoughts are with you. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 11:13 am
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Rank: Artist
Joined: 22 Jun 2007
Posts: 417
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I am so sorry Ganthros <( I don't even know what to say |
_________________ "Ia! Ia! Kothulhu Herishtagn!" - by BlekDef
I cry, when angels deserve to die! |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 11:48 am
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1606
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wow im sorry to hear that man.
truely the loss of a loved is indeed painful.
hope everything goes well for you. |
_________________ Crimson's Construction.
Bettering Bon Bon one building at a time. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 6:27 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 15 Feb 2007
Posts: 4668
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My sympathies and prayers go with you, your father, and the rest of your family, Gantros. I am so sorry and, for whatever it is worth, I hope he went peacfully and painlessly when he did. |
_________________ Silentium est aurum |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 8:54 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 1556
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That's sad to hear. You have my condolences. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 9:08 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 612
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May he find his way to the light. I will burn a candle for him, and offer prayers for you both. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 23, 2007 10:55 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 27 Jul 2005
Posts: 2568
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Our prayers will be with you and your father Gantros.
Take care, and may we see you, or at least hear that you are doing well in the future. |
_________________ The suspense is killing me. I hope it will last. |
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Posted:
Mon Sep 24, 2007 1:33 am
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Official Artist
Joined: 13 Nov 2004
Posts: 1088
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I offer you my condolences, Gantros, and I'm very sorry for the sorrowful moment that you've lived and for the pain that you're feeling. Only the time could ease this pain, and now I wish for you to find enough strength and many persons close to you to help you with love in this circumstance. I'm very sorry. |
_________________
http://www.pleasurebonbon.com |
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Posted:
Mon Sep 24, 2007 2:41 am
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 19 Jun 2007
Posts: 668
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I sorry that your father died. It's kinda sad to lose him. |
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Posted:
Tue Sep 25, 2007 10:24 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Posts: 2112
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I am truly sorry for your loss Gantros. I can sympathize with your loss all too well and if you need someone to talk to, we're here. |
_________________ I like old jokes. With them I know when to laugh. |
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Posted:
Tue Sep 25, 2007 11:30 pm
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Forum Admin
Joined: 18 Oct 2003
Posts: 3670
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Posted:
Wed Sep 26, 2007 2:31 am
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 03 Sep 2007
Posts: 29
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As one who has been there, my heart goes out to you. |
_________________ Revised Golden Rule: Do unto others as they do unto others. |
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Posted:
Wed Sep 26, 2007 4:58 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 21 Aug 2007
Posts: 836
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i never know what to say at times like this but i offer my sympathies to you and your entire family |
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Posted:
Sat Sep 29, 2007 2:43 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 504
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With all the emotional support from you guys, I think it is only fair that I keep you in the loop, forgive me if I don't give you any identifying details, this is a public forum after all.
All the doctors who have treated my dad came to the conclusion that he had some sort of attack, be it heart attack/failure or stroke. Be that as it may, it was apparently instant and non-preventable. I could have known in advance and taken him to the hospital and the outcome would not have changed. He will be cremated and placed in the family plot. Besides leaving my sister and I all his worldly possessions, he had built up nearly $15,000 in credit card debt over several cards. All legal advice we have sought states that my family is not responsible for this and the creditors have to eat the loss. Some good news is that I'm probably not going to leaving the site, as by cutting out non-essential bills and consolodating others under the same company (e.g. phone/cable/internet), I'm probably coming out pretty much the same as I did before, though there will still be some belt tightening in some areas.
As for grieving, I'm a little disturbed by the lack of any emotion on my part other than what I would consider 'normal'. I'm hoping this numbing is the result of shock, but I have arranged sessions with a therapist as a precaution. I will stay in contact as I find communicating with kindred spirits very helpful. Thank You. |
_________________ Most have only two choices in life, a life of happiness, or a life of meaning. It is truly a rare thing when one can achieve both. But given the choice, I choose happiness. |
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Posted:
Sat Sep 29, 2007 2:48 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 21 Aug 2007
Posts: 836
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a lack of emotion this soon after a family members death is not that unusual you are simply in shock. it will all hit you one day and its best to have someone else who cares nearby to share in your grief |
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Posted:
Sat Sep 29, 2007 4:42 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 15 Feb 2007
Posts: 4668
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It's good to hear from you again, Gantros, I'm glad you won't be leaving us. I'm glad you won't be going through any complicated financial difficulty due to your father's untimely passing. Things like that can be so troubling, for many reasons, so I'm glad it's something you won't have to deal with. As for your lack of emotion, I would'nt worry about it to much. I'm willing to bet it's shock, as you and Bestile said, and if you start having a problem with it, there are ways to reconcile it. After all is said and done, you'll come out of this grandly, I have no doubt. And that goes for the rest of your family as well. |
_________________ Silentium est aurum |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 30, 2007 12:16 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 27 Jul 2005
Posts: 2568
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Its good to hear your doing alright. Theres always that fear of tremendous debt when theres a death in the family.
Also, it doesn't seem to uncommon to me, that numbness. I've found myself emotionally detached from death. An understanding and my faith help me get over the death, without emotional breakdown. Though, it tends to come out a few weeks later as the reality crawls into my head. Perhaps that is how it will be with you.
A question I had for you Gantros is, if you do need time to recover, I can take over keeping in touch with Zone. I'm on their forum as well, so I can try to do my best if you need. Otherwise, let me know what I can do to help you out. |
_________________ The suspense is killing me. I hope it will last. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 30, 2007 12:46 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1606
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well its good to see that things will be ok.
as for the debt all you have to do is inform the banks of the loss and their take care of the rest. i see alot of that at the bank i work at so you should have no problems.
i wish you luck my friend.
"Time heals all wounds." |
_________________ Crimson's Construction.
Bettering Bon Bon one building at a time. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 30, 2007 5:56 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 504
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LabrnMystic wrote: |
A question I had for you Gantros is, if you do need time to recover, I can take over keeping in touch with Zone. I'm on their forum as well, so I can try to do my best if you need. Otherwise, let me know what I can do to help you out.
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Your welcome to try and make contact, I have tried to make several e-mails and PMs on his/her forum with no response whatsoever. Martin and Vanessa have had no such luck either, maybe the 4channers got him... |
_________________ Most have only two choices in life, a life of happiness, or a life of meaning. It is truly a rare thing when one can achieve both. But given the choice, I choose happiness. |
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Posted:
Sun Sep 30, 2007 7:31 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Posts: 2112
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Gantros wrote: |
As for grieving, I'm a little disturbed by the lack of any emotion on my part other than what I would consider 'normal'. I'm hoping this numbing is the result of shock, but I have arranged sessions with a therapist as a precaution. I will stay in contact as I find communicating with kindred spirits very helpful. Thank You.
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I'm not an expert, but I don't think that it's anything to get too worried about. Nor is it anything to be ashamed of. Everyone expresses grief differently and how you do so is nobody's business but your own. |
_________________ I like old jokes. With them I know when to laugh. |
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Posted:
Mon Oct 01, 2007 9:13 am
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 07 Sep 2006
Posts: 1000
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If it's any consolation, Gantros, that is how I have reacted to it. Probably better that way, I think, as the feelings always come to me little by little later on. Better than all of it hitting you at once and leaving you a wreck which is the other pattern I've seen.
I am sorry for your loss. Wish I could say or do more, but it would sound hollow to my ears. |
_________________ "Doktor! Are you sure this will work?!" "HAHA! I HAVE NO IDEA!" |
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