alleybaggett.net ~ View topic - Quagmire vs Brian- The Debate.

Royal Member of BonBon Joined: 29 May 2009 Posts: 6010

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdbnssEZ_Xk

For many of you that don't know, I love Family Guy as a whole. It spouted random nonsense mostly, but kept me entertained so long as the character the episode revolved around learned a lesson. Recently however, with all the darker tones that the show seems to be taking, its getting harder to like the characters the way I used to.

The one thing that irks me the most is the hateful resentment of one of my old favorite character: Glenn Quagmire towards Brian Griffin. This was a relationship that once existed between Stewie and 'The Dog'. Its not so much the fact that Quagmire hates Brian that gets me, so much as the reason 'why' he does. I'll break it down for you from his rant posted in the link above.

You are the worst person I know.

Ok, right off the bat, the rant is not off to a good start. While I do recognize Brian as a person, he is still a dog in the eyes of the rest of the community. If you remember, there was an episode where Brian had to fight for his right to live after accidently attacking somebody when he simply wanted to be treated with some common decency from the family he lived with.

You constantly hit on your best friend's wife. The man pays for your food and rescued you from certain death, and this is how you repay him?

Oh, and you have'nt quagmire? Maybe you might want to remember the times that you would steal bits of her hair, pictures, and other assorted belongings to put in your little 'shrine' that you erected on a sex doll to fantasize about doing her. Not only did that, but you also broke up Cleveland's marriage when you slept with his wife. Two lives, your best friends at that, nearly destroyed because of YOUR actions.

And to add insult to injury, you defecate all over his yard. And you're such a sponge. You pay for nothing. You're always like "Ooh, I'll get you later," but later never comes.

I think that we have already come to establish the fact that Brian is a dog and its far more difficult to stay his instincts to do what dogs need to when they need to go. Plus, I doubt that he would not exactly be very employable when everything he says turns into a bad joke (Would you like to try my meat logs?). Even then, he did try to make ends meet by performing with Frank Sinatra Jr at the old Cabana Club. And even more so to the fact that he did work in Peter's Restaraunt during its brief existence, and even performed on stage in multiple functions.

And what really bothers me, is you pretend that you're this deep guy that loves women for their souls, when all you do is date bimbos. Yeah, I date women for their bodies, but at least I'm honest about it.

At least Brian does'nt try to sleep with every woman that comes within arms reach. At least he tried to make it work, which is usually ruined by the Griffin family's embarassing nature, or because of the woman's flaws as a whole. Pearl Burton was a nice woman that he really wanted to connect to but her life was tragically cut short. Jillian was due to Peter and Lois' meddling when he had to move in with her (He could'nt afford the rent). Then finally there is Shauna Parks, who forced a choice on Brian to choose between his best friend or her.

You Quagmire, have slept with women (With or without their permission) worldwide, giving all manner of STDs of almost every conceivable type. Not only that, but you did'nt even try to make your marriage work with Kathryn before you had her subsequently killed by Death during his brief visit. After all that, you even went to had sex with her corpse. So in no way are you in any way capable of judging Brian in that regard.

I don't buy them a copy of Catcher in the Rye and then lecture them with some seventh grade interpretation about Holden Caulfield as some profound intellectual. He wasn't! He was a spoiled brat! And that's why you like him so much -- he's you! God, you're pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you're some great writer, even though you're terrible. You know, I should've known Cheryl Tiegs didn't write me that note. She would've known there's no "a" in the word "definite."

Brian tried really hard to be a good writer, but with few sources of inspiration when people constantly shot him down, he eventually made it to the end, and even got it published. It was under less favorable circumstances I admit. He wanted to be treated like an intellectual, because it was the one thing he had going for him that was slowly slipping away as he was once the voice of reason in the entire show.

And what I think I hate most about you is your textbook liberal agenda. How we should (mockingly) "legalize pot, man...", how big business is crushing the underclass, how homelessness is the biggest tragedy in America... well what have you done to help?! I work down at the soup kitchen, Brian. Never seen you down there. You wanna help? Grab a ladle!

Get over yourself Quagmire, those are all very legitmate reasons to be concerned about, and Brian did organize an animal awareness group that failed horribly. At least you get to be acknowledged on a continual basis, where Brian has to constantly walk the shadow of obscurity and has to frequently struggle to be put into the light, sometimes even desparately.

And by the way, driving a Prius does not make you **BLEEP** **BLEEP**. (getting angrier still) Oh wait, you don't believe in **BLEEP** **BLEEP**, or any religion for that matter because "religion is for idiots." Well who the hell are you to talk down to anyone?!

I never see you at a church Quagmire, so what does that say about your religious belief?! At least he is able to say it, and even Jesus who made a cameo appearance said that "6 to 1 they are all a bunch of crap". Plus, I have never even seen Brian once boast the fact that he has a Prius, so its not like he was shoving it into everyone's faces.

You failed college twice, which isn't nearly as bad as your failure as a father. How's that son of yours you never see?

Only because of the fact that Brian refused to cheat on his exam and because of Stewie's intervention in the matter, so at least he tried. He is only 8 years old so he does'nt even have the luxury of time to waste either. And if you want to say anything about Brian's parenting, he did turn his life around and he went back willingly to his mother to do the same for her. Well you sir, have children all over the world and I have yet to see you take care of any of them. You even gave away the only daughter into child-care, which is about the only noble thing I have ever witnessed you doing because she is going to miss on being just like you.

But you know what? I could forgive all of that... all of it... if you weren't such a BORE. That's the worst of it, Brian. You're just a big, sad, alcoholic BORE!

Brian has his flaws, but he is far from a bore. He has had many grand adventures with his friend, Stewie. He traveled back in time, He went across the ocean to get him back when he ran away, he tried to help Meg when she threatened to kill herself by going to the dance. He went across one dimension to the next. So how, in any way, does this make him a bore? Glenn Quagmire, I think you need to look at yourself in the mirror and see who the real bore is.

Rank: Super Veteran Joined: 26 Mar 2011 Posts: 2709

Some of this I could agree with a little others not as much.

He may be a dog but there are several instances where he is treated like being a person, like getting into bars and such I don't know any bars that let dogs in and serve them drinks.

True quagmire hits on lois but you also have to figure look how he is, so is it really any surprise that he wants the one woman he basicly can't have, loretta chose to sleep with quagmire because she wanted some excitement he didn't seduce her, even look how the episode started she made quagmire reach between her breasts to get a fish out that got stuck in there.

Brian has had several jobs throughout the series but they always fall through, whether because he quits or the episode ends, can agree about the instincts though.

Quagmire didn't say he better in that sense, he sleeps with woman because he wants to sleep with them and makes a good point, how many intelligent woman has brian got with and actually showed a good level of commitment, Jillian was the one that went the longest and yes the griffins did get involved but thats because brian was leading her on, she asked him to move in and he admitted he didn't want a real relationship but was telling jillian that he did, so lois called him out on it and he moved in to try and prove he was a bad guy like that.

The main two things brian wrote that stuck out was the one "What I learned on jefferson street." but his mistake there was trying to get it made into a tv show and then not sticking up for it when they decided to make changes. the other was the article he wrote about meg in in that magazine in the episode she got arrested for harboring her con boyfriend, the one faster than the speed of love was actually a story that existed in a movie he hadn't seen before. But a good writer finds inspiration anywhere they can, not just at home.

There was an episode that addressed that, the one with rush limbaugh, where he shows that he will follow anyone who makes even a slight point, he read a book and poof his opinions changed drasticly, yet a small talk in jail and his opinions changed back instantly.

Actually there are a few episodes where you see quagmire in church though that makes no sense, yet in that episode where the news channel pulled a prank for april fools brian was seen praying because stewie caught him.

Yes it's true stewie did have a hand in that episode but the reason brian went back to college is because he was fired from the new yorker (another job he had) because he was a college drop out and he decided to try and go back to finish, he was going to drop out but stewie answered some papers for him, and then he failed the final test because he didn't learn or understand the material which wasn't changed simply because of stewie, the part about his son is a good point, though if I remember right the only time brian and his son actually connected at all was when they got stoned.

This one is a very good point, all the adventures you talk about, who else saw them, did Lois see them go into the past to save mort, or see them jumping between realities, or when they went to the north pole, they lied about what happened in the episode where brian went to pick up stewie from the pewterschmidst home in the road to rhode island episode, so in the eyes of the rest of the city they don't know those things happened so they technicly can't apply in this situation.