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General Forum -> Adult Jokes/Humor & Erotic Stories ~ A ode' to crude humor... |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:05 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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One evening, two old ladies were sitting on a park bench, both smoking. Suddenly, it started to rain. One of the old women reached into her purse, pulled out a condom, cut of its tip, and slid it onto her cigarette. The other old lady looked over at her and said, "Hey, that's pretty clever! What is that thing?. The first old lady replied, "A condom." The second old lady then asked, "Where can I buy one of those?". "At any supermarket around here." The other replied. The second old lady wanted one, so they both got up and went to the supermarket. Inside, the second old lady went up to the store clerk. "Excuse me, do you sell condoms here?" she asked him. "We sure do, we have them in the back." He replied, a bit suprised. "What size did you need?" he then asked. "One that will fit a Camel." she replied.
*Braces self for audience groans and throwing tomatoes* |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:12 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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God that was both clever and crude....But it's fairly good in my opinion. |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
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Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:19 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
God that was both clever and crude....But it's fairly good in my opinion.
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*Wipes sweat of brow* Whew! Well, that's one bullet dodged. *Puts down riot shield* |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:33 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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*Sees him put down riot shield and throws tomato chew toy; it hits his head with a squeak and hits the ground*
There...if that makes you feel better about using the shield... |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
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Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 12:38 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
*Sees him put down riot shield and throws tomato chew toy; it hits his head with a squeak and hits the ground*
There...if that makes you feel better about using the shield...
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No! I have an over sesative hea----*BOOM head explodes* |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 1:01 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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Hmm....OK
*Waves hands in weird motion and casts a healing spell and his head is fully repaired*
One more thing...
*Casts another spell to make his head stronger*
There that should do it. |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 1:16 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
Hmm....OK
*Waves hands in weird motion and casts a healing spell and his head is fully repaired*
One more thing...
*Casts another spell to make his head stronger*
There that should do it.
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Ah. thats better! *Cracks neck*
Hm...one thing though...why do I now have three legs? (Ah, the amount of dirty humor I can think of is disturbing, lol) |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 1:51 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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I could have that removed for you...I know a spell for almost everything...
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_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 3:43 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
I could have that removed for you...I know a spell for almost everything...
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Haha, no I'm fine, I think my fiance might be interested to see this. |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 3:57 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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So you going to try and get your fiance on the forums? Well go ahead the more the merrier... |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 4:03 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
So you going to try and get your fiance on the forums? Well go ahead the more the merrier...
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Lol, no well actually I was joking about the "third leg" thing.
Haha, nah she wouldnt be interested in this. |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:08 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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Ahh OK....well whatever man... |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:13 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:15 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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That fine....Dorian has his girlfriend on...so I was just wondering if you would have her on as well...But if not that fine as well.. |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:18 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
That fine....Dorian has his girlfriend on...so I was just wondering if you would have her on as well...But if not that fine as well..
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Well sadly, she's not really into the "furry" part of life, if you get me. She likes pets, though. |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
-------------------------------------
Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:32 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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Ahh I see...well that's fine; everyone has there own things they like... |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:33 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 03 Feb 2010
Posts: 6190
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:36 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Hoshiginiro wrote: |
*groans and throws a rotten tomato at you it flies past your head and hits the curtain behind you* your lucky i'm a crappy thrower
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*Quickly looks at splattered tomato*
No! My worst nightmares HAVE come true! *Raises riot shield back up*
Have pity! I'm still a virgin! (Can you believe it?) |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
-------------------------------------
Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:40 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 03 Feb 2010
Posts: 6190
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dude like almost every one on this forum is a virgin i think me, silvador, mayfield, bio and like maybe 6 others aren't virgins so its nothing new for me |
_________________ Star Silver
Medel Gargen
CafePress
FurAffinity |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:41 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Hoshiginiro wrote: |
dude like almost every one on this forum is a virgin i think me, silvador, mayfield, bio and like maybe 6 others aren't virgins so its nothing new for me
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Oh well in that case.....*plays dead* |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
-------------------------------------
Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:41 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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Hay you should be honored if Hoshi would be willing to take your virginity...I wish she could take mine honestly
*Hugs Hoshi* |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
-----
Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:43 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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Pachs wrote: |
Hay you should be honored if Hoshi would be willing to take your virginity...I wish she could take mine honestly
*Hugs Hoshi*
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*Looks up from ground*
HA! She would be so lucky to get me!
<.< >.> *Lays back down*
(FYI Hoshi, your cools wid me! But I'm sorry...my heart belongs to another...) |
Last edited by Wolfbane007 on Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:58 pm; edited 1 time in total _________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 5:49 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 30 Sep 2009
Posts: 9138
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:23 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 18 Dec 2009
Posts: 7678
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:26 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 22 Jun 2010
Posts: 6953
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*Quickly adapts his Anti-Pie Shield to block Tomato and give it to Wolfbane*
Just turn it on...no need for the Riot shield.. |
_________________ "Shake the hand that shook the world"
-Randall Flagg-
"Bleach is healthy... It's mostly water; and we're mostly water. Therefore, we are bleach."
-Nathan Explosion-
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Pachs Gajah |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:28 pm
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Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 30 Aug 2008
Posts: 1521
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That's it!
*With a radiating wave of senselessness, all the Rotten Tomatoes become pies*
Forum rule 9000: All forum disputes are to be settled with PIE!
You may continue. |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:36 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 03 Feb 2010
Posts: 6190
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:42 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 18 Dec 2009
Posts: 7678
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:45 pm
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Rank: Veteran
Joined: 27 Sep 2010
Posts: 602
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*Suddenly walks in eating cheesecake*
Hey guys, what the hell are you doing with my hologram?
(Haha Hoshi I'm confused too, I never said that.) |
_________________ Alexander Sinclair
http://forums.pleasurebonbon.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10659
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Suspicion often creates what it suspects-
C.S. Lewis |
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Posted:
Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:48 pm
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Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 18 Dec 2009
Posts: 7678
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